The Two: A gift for thinking of others

Two's are empathetic and generous, oriented towards others and constantly concerned about the relationship between people. They make it their business, and have a knack for, understanding the feelings of others and knowing what others need. They will be the first to put themselves out for those needing help or support and are the people who will proverbially 'give the last shirt off their back' for someone in need. Which all sounds good, right?'.

However, this creates huge problems for them also. Twos want to be seen, and see themselves, as selfless, so to not be helping others or being there for them in some way is very difficult for them. As a result they can find themselves running around taking care of others or doing things for them to the point of exhaustion. In fact they tend to look after others' needs before they look after their own which inevitably creates difficulties for them in their lives. If they are not careful they can find that they are the ones needing help, having neglected themselves and their own concerns for too long. Other people can also sometimes take advantage of the Two's generous and helpful nature. Clearly then, we can see that being tuned in to others and their needs is a wonderful thing (for everyone else especially) but for the Two, it has to be balanced with a healthy respect for their own needs and boundaries. We simply cannot 'be there' for everyone. We also need to be able to look after our own self which means sometimes focusing on our own needs and desires. This involves being able to know how and when to say 'no' to others.

It is worth pointing out that the Two is the personality Type most associated with the conventional idea of the feminine - as selfless and pleasing - and women have been conditioned to a certain extent to believe that they must be this way. It can therefore be a double whammy for women who are Type Two as their personality bias towards revolving themselves around others is reinforced by society. This validation may push them even further so that they end up burnt out, resentful and ill, having given too much of themselves to everyone else with nothing left for themselves.

NB: It is important to note that although certain personality traits may be thought of as more 'feminine' or 'masculine', it seems from research that the personality Types are fairly equally distributed amongst the population irrespective of gender or sexuality. .